Thursday, August 21, 2008

Falling

Getsumen to Heiki Miina-fanfic. Suiren has done something impulsive and ended up revealing her true feelings for Mina in front of the cameras.
(Suiren/Mina)


Read Falling




Disclaimer: Getsumen to Heiki Miina belongs to... Gonzo, I think, probably others as well. At any rate I’m playing around with these characters without permission, though surely there’s no harm done.

I can’t recall exactly how old Mina was in the series or if Suiren’s age was ever mentioned, but please take those and any other improvisations in stride. I’m just winging it here. ;)




Falling
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by Carola “Ryûchan” Eriksson




Koushuu Suiren was in hiding.

It was something rather unthinkable really, but yes, Suiren was once again in hiding. She had not shown up for work for three days now, and her... other... duties had also been largely evaded or handled swiftly on her own.

Drawing her knees up until she could hide her face against them Suiren tried not to give in to the stinging of her eyes. It was so stupid; she was stupid... and she had lost something too precious to name because of it.

The day she in the aftermath of a mission had carried her colleague out of the burning remains of a building and in relief, heedless of the cameras directed at them, kissed her when the other had opened her eyes and wheezed that she was alright.

The day Suiren kissed Mina.

It was just a small kiss really. She had apologized immediately before running from the scene in horror of what she had done, and she would gladly apologize every single day from here on out if it meant that the bond between herself and Mina could be restored.

But despite being just a small, brief thing, the kiss had been rather clear to all in purpose: Suiren loved her much younger friend, colleague and partner. Not as a friend should, or even an older sister or mentor, but simply loved.

Hadn’t she known how impossible it was? How wrong it was? Hadn’t she told herself over and over that she had to stop having these thoughts, these feelings for the girl? Mina was barely seventeen, hardly more than a child!

A treacherous voice that to Suiren’s mind represented her wilder and more impulsive alter ego, Ootsuki Miina, whispered that if Mina was old enough to fight and risk her life, then she was old enough to be loved.

No! Even if Mina was old enough to fall in love and maybe start a relationship by now, well, Suiren herself was just too old by rights to consider it! She was five years older than Mina for heaven’s sake!

Four and a half, the voice corrected helpfully, and what does that matter? Kiryuu is two years older than you, yet everyone at work are expecting and even encouraging Mina to hook up with him.

Albeit reluctantly, Suiren had to admit that this was true. She was the only one at work that had any kind of problem with Kiryuu potentially dating Mina... in fact, hadn’t she driven her motorcycle up to that remote resort late in the evening solely because it had been suggested to her that with the two of them alone like that, Kiryuu might just try something with her sweet, innocent Mina?

Suiren sighed.

No, she shouldn’t make Kiryuu out to be a bad guy like this, he didn’t deserve it. He had been a friend for years, and one that had supported her and Mina both when push came to shove. As guys went, despite the age difference, he’d be a good choice for Mina. A good boyfriend. He just wasn’t Suiren.

The voice inside was wailing by now: it is not fair; you love her more than he; you would be better for her; she loves you too!

Fairness had nothing to do with it, and what she could or would be for Mina was irrelevant. It could never be, and thanks to her slip-up now Suiren had lost even the friendship they shared.

What a sad truth that Mina had been the first, and so far only, really truly close friend Suiren had. Was there any aspect of Suiren and her life that Mina didn’t just... get, like no-one else could? Well, save perhaps for the one aspect that made her kiss the younger girl, of course.

It was strong, this bond between them. Strong and warm, and it meant everything to Suiren. Maybe that was part of the problem, maybe it was just too easy, too tempting, to look at the friendship, the adoration and the smidgen of hero-worship that Mina still nurtured, and imagine something more?

She knew she shouldn’t indulge herself in fruitless fantasies, but the memory of a specific moment shared between them was too sweet to resist, and for just a brief moment Suiren didn’t want to fight herself.

They had been falling together through the upper layers of the atmosphere, Suiren with her larger form angled down in some fruitless gallant attempt at shielding Mina with her own body as she held her close. Mina had smiled so tenderly, looked at Suiren so adoringly, before resting her head on Suiren’s ample and ridiculously revealing cleavage, her face nestled perfectly above Suiren’s heart.

It had felt so peaceful, having Mina resting there in her arms, that it had been easy to forget that they were in fact plummeting down to earth not knowing if their descent could be stopped. It had just been too perfect a moment for such thoughts.

In some ways Suiren could picture herself there now, still falling, still holding that precious treasure, lit up by the flames behind her and embraced by the dark star-strewn sky. Falling forever.

Closing her eyes Suiren allowed herself to drift away to that memory. Weary as she was from three days of internal struggles, sleep found her quickly.

-----------------------

Waking was slow and reluctant, her body protesting that it was robbed of much-needed sleep, yet something was nonetheless calling Suiren awake. Distantly and sluggishly she registered a muffled thump. A moment later, a louder one.

She opened her eyes just in time to see a very familiar form coming out of her bathroom.

“Mina.” She greeted casually while trying to remember why the girl had been in her bathroom to begin with. Finally the fog of sleep lifted from her mind just as Mina nervously sat down next to her.

“Suiren-senpai, you didn’t answer the door and you’ve disconnected the phone.” Mina said by way of unasked-for explanation, blushing rather badly. “I climbed in through the window.”

The image of Mina somehow hanging outside of her apartment at the fourth floor, finding and entering through the bathroom window that had been cracked open a little, derailed Suiren just long enough for the younger woman to lean in and press her lips to Suiren’s.

As kisses go, it was rather brief and Suiren did not have the chance to gather herself enough to respond, still it managed to be somewhat longer than the moment of impulsiveness which had caused Suiren’s latest self-enforced seclusion. Distractedly Suiren noted how attractive the strong rose hue that washed over the face in front of her was, and how when the pinkness reached to the tip of otherwise unadorned ears it made her want to kiss them.

Shaking her head a little Suiren tried to regain at least some grasp of the situation.

“M-Mina! Wha-what... what are you doing?”

Despite being even more nervous and shy in the wake of the sudden and bold act, the brown eyes that peeked up at Suiren still held a surprising note of determination. “It is either a response or it is payback...”

“It all depends on your reaction, Suiren-senpai.”

“Payback?” Suiren managed somewhat quietly after a long moment of silence while Mina waited patiently.

“Yes... if that is the way you want it, senpai, then that made us even and you don’t have to avoid me anymore. You’ll come in to work tomorrow and we’ll ask Mutsumune-senpai to help us clear things up with the viewers.”

“I...” Mina fidgeted a little moving ever so slightly closer. “...was rather hoping you would pick the other option though.”

With that it was Suiren’s turn to blush, though far more sedately. “I-I, err, I m-mean...” She closed her eyes for a second, taking a steadying breath before facing her temptation. “Do you know what you are saying, Mina?” A choked sound escaped her and she put a hand to her eyes. “What am I saying... I am too old for you, there are a thousand reasons why this...”

A pair of slender hands cupping her face stopped whatever else Suiren was about to say.

“Those are merely excuses. How do you really feel? No reasons, no rationalizations, just your honest emotions.”

Suiren almost had the younger woman sitting in her lap by now, the gentle hands caressing her face granting her a sense of peace that she wasn’t quite willing to give up. “I... I...”

Seeing Suiren’s struggle Mina spoke in soft encouragement. “Would it help at all if I told you that although I didn’t know it then, I fell in love with you the first time we met?”

They had both been so very young then, the new and aspiring teen sports reporter and the girl from the loosing team whose hands had been busted in the game. Suiren had been chewed out by her superior for opting to interview someone from the losing team rather than the winners, but the viewers had liked it and in retrospect it had proved one of those small but very important steps on her career path. It hadn’t been work that had made Suiren’s eyes seek out the girl who struggled on despite her scuffed and bleeding hands; it hadn’t been for the sake of a sympathy interview that she had remained behind to help patch the girl up long after the others had left.

She had wondered afterwards just what had motivated her choice that day, but the answer never came to her. The memory itself was clear in her mind though, so when the same girl years later was introduced to Suiren as the new teen reporter and Suiren’s young colleague it had been accompanied with a jolt of fascinated recognition. Of course, very soon afterwards she had been informed that Mina was a colleague in her other field of work as well, and a deep and solid friendship grew between them surprisingly fast. Soon they were not just colleagues; they were partners and best friends. It wasn’t Mina’s fault Suiren had been unable to stay like that. It wasn’t anyone’s fault but Suiren’s that once she loved the girl that dearly her heart simply couldn’t stop at mere ‘friends’.

“I love you.” She had to touch that precious face. “It snuck up on me while I wasn’t aware of it, but I do and I have for a long time.”

“Then that is all that matters.” Mina leaned into Suiren’s hand with such a sweet smile on her lips. “I love you too... Suiren.”

This time when their lips met it wasn’t some brief caress that needed explanation. This time their kiss was long, unhurried and involved, the kind new lovers delight in and Suiren and Mina were no exception. Suiren experienced again the strangely peaceful sensation of falling with Mina in her arms.

A long time later, with Mina draped over Suiren nuzzling her neck and both of them drifting slowly towards sleep, Suiren still had a few questions to mumble into soft brown hair.

“Work?”

There was a light giggle against her neck. “The ratings went up, so it’s ok. Mutsumune-senpai says that although we’ve gotten a few negative messages sent in the positive response has been overwhelming. Nothing to worry about.”

“And school?”

“Mixed responses. My friends are supportive and most seem to just accept it, beyond that I don’t really care about those that choose to be morons.”

Relieved Suiren allowed herself to drift along the edge of sleep for a good long while, until another alarming thought decided to make its appearance. “Mina... your family...”

“Told mom.” A yawn interrupted the sleepy words. “Knows I’m staying here tonight.”

Suiren barely resisted the urge to whimper. “S-she knows? And she... approves?”

“Mnn. ‘Proves.” A slender hand came up to touch Suiren’s lips. “Shush. Sleep now.”

With a helplessly fond smile Suiren gave the fingers a little kiss before complying with the request, tightening her arms a little more around the young woman who was clearly more or less already sleeping. As the last of the tension she had carried drained away, Suiren happily surrended to sleep, warm and loved at last.

And she dreamt of stars.



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy you're writing again! Sleep tight! Chuchu!

/Himechan

Ryûchan said...

Thank you my princess! ^__^