Sunday, July 29, 2007

FRAILTY

What if a woman very much down on her luck, broke and with her health in tatters were to come upon a very special kind of lamp?
Edit: Now finished. The rest of the story can be found in "Frailty pt2".

Read Frailty






Disclaimer: This is an original story, so no disclaimers needed. The title happens to be the same as the title of a movie, I am aware of that, but really, the two have nothing whatsoever in common besides that.




FRAILTY
--------------------------------------
by Carola “Ryûchan” Eriksson




Riley Thomas was sitting at her rickety table with its two mismatched chairs pouring over her mail. She put the junk mail addressed to ‘Mr Thomas’ aside with nary a bat of her lashes, it was a common mistake that she had long since gotten used to. What made the pale features look even more haggard and resigned than usual was the stack of bills that just grew higher on the centre of the small kitchen table.

Especially when compared to the small stack of bills and coins placed neatly at her side. It just wasn’t going to cut it... again.

It was quite the dilemma... pay the rent, or pay a hospital bill or two. She hadn’t paid for electricity in quite a while, and as a result the small, run down space that was her home was dark and cool, something she didn’t mind in the summer. It wasn’t that cold, and she did allright with her candles or what sunlight came in through the small windows. Winter would be worse, she needed the heat then, and if she didn’t think of something before the cold set in for real, she’d be in trouble.

It wasn’t as if she was terribly prim about paying her hospital bills, in fact she only paid enough of them so that she wouldn’t risk being turned out next time she needed hospital care, because she just couldn’t afford to. And in her case, there would always be a next time... until she would finally be beyond help.

Riley took a few deep, calming breaths... or as deep as she could, which wasn’t much really, since it was summer after all, and that meant the metal bands that always restricted her lungs crushed them together even further. It was one of life’s ironies that while the summer heat eased the pain in her aching limbs a little, the summer air could end up killing her if she was not very careful. She hadn’t truly enjoyed the spring and summer in so many years now, preferring the winter and snow even if the cold brought more pain. Riley’s stomach protested loudly in the silence, accompanied by burning and the beginnings of a pressing pain in her chest area.

Riley sighed.

She should eat something, in fact she should have already, to go with all the medicine, but... the cupboards were empty. They had been empty for some time, really. Tap water would have to soothe the belly beast for the moment, even if that meant the pain would set in soon and be pretty unbearable.

Of course, Riley was pretty used to unbearable pain by now. In fact, she couldn’t remember what it had felt like to have a day when there was no pain... had she ever experienced a day without pain? It seemed a ludicrous thought.

Food or medicine, that was a common dilemma as well. Usually if she got one, she wouldn’t be able to afford the other, and tried to balance it all so that she’d just pull through somehow. Soon it wouldn’t be anything left to struggle with, she figured, and she’d die from it all anyway, whether by one or several of her illnesses or by starving didn’t really matter.

Not that any of the diseases Riley had were fatal, oh no. They were just permanent, painful and bad, and some could kill if not treated properly... but you needed money to buy medicine, and to get money Riley would need to work. And to be able to work she’d have to be well enough to handle some poorly paid job somewhere nearby, which required medicines and a state of health she hadn’t been close to in a long time. Not having a terminal disease meant that there was little help to get, and even less understanding to have... and so Riley Thomas fell through the cracks.

She had felt vain hope, and had that hope dashed with reality. She had raged against the unfairness, then gone through denial followed by apathy and depression. She still felt depression lurking around sometimes, but mostly she had just resigned to what life was, and the fact that she wasn’t going to live it for very long.

Riley stared at the bills with unblinking, unseeing eyes for a long moment, then sighed as she came to a decision. She’d pay the rent this time, but not all of it... perhaps she could get away with paying just enough to leave a little cash to buy some food with, she’d have to bitch with her landlord again and probably get threatened to be evicted once more, but he really didn’t have anyone that wanted that dark and dank hole in the wall that was her home.

Having made up her mind, Riley grabbed her money, put the bills away for another time and another ulcer, carefully put out her candles, put her asthma medicine in the pocket of her jacket and headed out into the daylight.

Riley Thomas had no family, and no real friends to speak of. There were people who knew her, or rather knew of her, in the area where she lived, of course... the little old lady across the street always greeted her warmly, the people at the local cheap-shop knew her by name, and a number of people around would nod or wave in greeting as she passed them by. But they didn’t know her. Knowing someone like Riley, being friends with someone like her, was just too demanding for most people. If there was anyone that Riley would consider a friend in her life as it was now, it would be the old man who lived in the scabby apartment above her, who would occasionally check in on her to make sure she hadn’t gone and died in there.

Riley tried not to dwell on it too much, just like she tried not to dwell on a lot of things in her life, as she walked down the street. A group of people were standing at the street corner, and a young woman waved at Riley. Riley waved back, a faint smile on her pale features, intending to keep walking when to her surprise the woman crossed the street to run up to her. A small battered leaflet was trust in Riley’s hand, and the young woman pointed at something in it. Blinking a bit surprised at the friendly exuberance, Riley caught the words ‘new place’ and ‘dung cheap’ as well as an urging to ‘go check it out’ from the young woman, before she had bounded off back to the group on the other side of the street again, leaving Riley to stare after her.

Riley looked at the battered piece of paper, yes, it was apparently some new store that had opened up, selling cheap second-hand things. They had a special offer for the opening day which tempted Riley to go see if she could find some candles she could afford, considering she was running a bit low on them at the moment. Stepping up to the young woman whose name she didn’t recall, if she had ever known it in the first place, Riley asked for directions.


The store had Riley quite puzzled once she reached it. From the outside it looked like someone had just put in a door in the side of the building, although Riley could have sworn there used to be a small alley there before, and besides the brightly coloured paper sign stuck to the wall above the door, and large pamphlet-filled ashtray mounted on a wooden sculpture of a naked woman right outside the door, no-one would have been able to tell this was the place.

Inside though, it was large, too large it seemed, but crammed to overflowing with dusty old things. In the far back was a dimly lit counter with an ancient cash register and a little old lady, smiling kindly at the people buying a small knickknack or other from her. Above the counter was an old painted sign with the message ‘Come find that which you need most’, which made Riley smile just a little. What she needed most couldn’t be found here or anywhere, but the two boxes of mismatched and truly dirt cheap old candles that Riley found not far from the door would do just nicely.

Another item caught Riley’s eye as she stood next to the counter, offering up her money for the much needed candles, and almost as if hypnotized, Riley left her money on the counter to walk heedlessly towards that strange thing.

It was in the far back, crammed in among the dustier things that looked as if no-one had even glanced at them in a long time, and still it gleamed dully in the dark corner. Riley squatted down carefully to look at it a bit more closely.

It was a candle holder, shaped like a beautiful old lamp, the dark and delicately wrought metal of the base branching up into the multi-coloured glass lampshade, and Riley found herself thinking that it would probably look very lovely once cleaned up and lit... in fact, it would look quite nice on the small square table she had in front of the couch that was also her bed. Shaking herself out of the pointless musing, Riley drew back the hand that was about to touch the multicoloured glass, straightened... and nearly bumped right into the little old lady.

There was something odd about this old lady, Riley decided. Although she was tiny and wrinkled and old, the blue eyes looked shockingly young and sharp as she gazed thoughtfully at Riley. An amused smiled played on the withered lips as she looked up at Riley, then back at the lamp.

“Did you find what you need most, dear?” The voice was warm and friendly, but the intense look in those blue eyes startled Riley for a moment. When Riley didn’t answer, the old lady tacked on “Do you like it, dear?”

Absently Riley answered something in the affirmative, and watched in fascinated shock how the wrinkled face lit up with satisfied glee.

The next thing Riley knew she was standing in the street outside her home, the lamp and a small white plastic bag containing candles held with both arms. A startled inspection showed her that she had exactly the same amount of money in her tattered purse as she had when entering the store, despite having left it apparently with both candles and lamp. An eerie chill travelled up Riley’s spine.

She hurried to backtrack, to go back to the store with her new things, find out what had happened, and apologize for whatever she might have done that she couldn’t recall. But even though Riley would have sworn she walked the same way as before, there was no shop anywhere. She searched for some time, and even thought she had found the place at first, only to find that there was an alley where the shop should have been. After a while Riley was just too fatigued and too much in need of her medications to continue, so she held her lamp with arms that were shaking from the exertion and made her way back home.

Realizing that she had forgotten to buy food in all the excitement, Riley wearily took her much-needed medication, then went to lie down on her couch for a moment, hoping the dizziness and nausea wouldn’t be so bad that way.

She woke up many hours later with her small home thrown into darkness as the sun had set some time ago. Riley awoke with a jolt, and scrambled around in a sleepy daze until she caught hold of her bag of candles and the mysterious lamp. Hesitating for only a moment, Riley lit up one of the thick candles and squeezed it into position in the lamp, thinking it couldn’t hurt and she might as well enjoy it for the night.

An involuntary smile curled on pale lips as she watched the warm glow spread through the glass, wishing suddenly that she had thought to clean it up first, but still enjoying the tinted light in her darkness.

Then to her surprised alarm the light did not stop, but increased in intensity until it bathed the room and Riley had to shield her sensitive eyes from the brightness... before it was gone just as suddenly as it had appeared, leaving only the warm glow of the candle inside the lamp. Riley blinked a few times to help her stinging eyes to recover and readjust to the darkness, pressing the tears away as she looked around in reflex.

And stopped, wide-eyed and staring at the figure standing right in front of her.

“Who the heck are you?” Riley yelped in surprise, staring at the woman standing in front of her. “Who are you, and how did you get in here?” Riley thought that surely she had locked her door, but then again, after the memory lapse regarding the shop and the lamp, she wasn’t entirely sure she could trust herself anymore.

The woman smiled enigmatically at Riley, and Riley felt her heart rate go up a notch further. Whoever she was, this woman was lovely, Riley decided, even if she was breaking into her home for some unfathomable reason. A mass of deep red curls that cascaded down her back, a striking, heart-shaped face with full lips, and eyes that shone like silver in the light of the lamp. Looking down, Riley saw the tiny and gauzy outfit her unexpected visitor was wearing, and felt even more faint. _Oh my_, was this woman ever beautiful.

“Look...” Riley started nervously. “...I don’t know who you are, but if you came to rob me, well, take what you want, I have nothing that’s worth anything. And if you’re here because you want to kill someone and figured no-one will miss me, well, it’s not like I can put up much of a fight.”

The strange woman smiled a bit more.

“I am not here to harm you, Riley Thomas.” The stranger’s voice was surprisingly deep and sultry, causing shivers to travel down Riley’s spine. “I am here because you summoned me.”

Riley looked at the stranger suspiciously, edging back on her couch carefully. Beautiful or not, this was clearly some nut case that might just decide to keep Riley captive in her home and slowly torture her to death, or something similarly evil and depraved. “Who are you, and how do you know my name” She demanded, while discreetly eyeing the door with some longing.

“My name is Isaber.” The lovely stranger said, shifting slightly and cutting off Riley’s intended retreat. “And I am here to grant you three wishes.”

-----


“Three wishes?” Riley echoed, incredulous.

“Three wishes.” Isaber confirmed, smiling quite becomingly. “You can wish for anything, as long as it is for yourself. Your wishes may not involve another unless it is indirectly, and I cannot change the past for you.” A slender, graceful hand moved up to lightly touch her heart in some strange gesture of servitude. “Chose your wishes wisely, and your wording even more so.”

Riley blinked. Then her eyebrows climbed quite high on her forehead. “So, you’re saying you’re what... a genie?”

Isaber tapped her chin in playful consideration. “You... could say that.”

“Uhuh. You’re a genie.” Riley said slowly. “And... what, I’m supposed to have rubbed a lamp and you came out?”

“No...” Isaber said, frowning a little then patting the lamp Riley had gotten with her home under such strange circumstances. “Not like that.” Isaber cleared her throat a little. “When the heart that is worthy lights a candle in my lamp, I am summoned from beyond to grant three wishes.”

Isaber bounced the step forward and pounced on the couch next to Riley, close enough to make the pale and wide-eyed woman lean away slightly at the invasion of her personal space. “Yours is that worthy heart, and you have summoned me.” Isaber’s smile was delighted. “I was created for you, for this moment, to grant you your wishes.”

The round-eyed Riley was silent for a long moment. Then “Are you... real?”

“I told you, I was created for you... therefore I am real to you.” Isaber said gently, looking sad for a moment. “When I have granted your wishes, I may become truly real... but no, that does not matter now.”

Riley found herself curiously wanting to comfort the strange woman leaning into her personal space, until the sad expression left those pale silvery eyes. She blinked a little and pulled herself back together. “Can you prove that you are a... genie, or whatever you prefer to be called?”

Isaber smiled. “Of course I can! What to do though... hmm...” She tapped her chin with slender fingers and looked around. “Oh, I know!” One graceful wave of her hand and all the electric lights that had not been working for so long switched on, bathing the room in bright light. “There.”

Riley cried out a little and clutched her hands to her eyes, moaning slightly from the sudden pain so soon after the first assault on her sensitive eyes. A gentle hand on her forehead erased the pain, and in surprise Riley looked up into Isaber’s silver eyes. Isaber smiled and spoke, but Riley didn’t catch it. “Huh? What?”

Isaber smiled and leaned in until they were almost nose to nose. “Isaber.”

“I prefer to be called Isaber.”

-----


With all the confusion and strange goings-on, Riley decided to splurge, and went out to buy herself something to eat. Isabel assured her that she did not need to eat, but Riley still felt slightly guilty when she opened her brown paper bag to take her first bite of the greasy sandwich with wilted greens that was her version of a fancy take-out dinner. She tried not to think about the fact that the cost of the sandwich, although cheap, would have gotten her several meals worth of the cheap instant noodles that were her staple food.

Riley also tried not to think about wishes, what was real or not, and whether or not she had finally gone and lost her mind as well. Instead she focused with all her being on eating slowly, chewing properly although she wanted to just cram the entire thing into her mouth, and cherishing the taste of grease and cardboard. If she ate too fast or did not chew properly, the pain in her chest would intensify even further, or worse, she’d end up loosing her precious dinner, that was a lesson she learned long ago.

The meal took the edge out of the hunger, but also awoke the tiny blades in her abdomen... Riley closed her eyes and focused on that pain for a moment. No, it was only a minor pang, it was nothing to worry about yet to Riley’s relief. Some more medicine followed the meal, and then, weary beyond belief from the day’s excitement, Riley wanted to go to bed.

And that meant another dilemma for her to solve. Riley only had the one couch to sleep in, no bed, and no extra furniture that could be used. Certainly, the couch could be pulled out to convert into a bed large enough for two, but... she eyed the beautiful stranger warily. Did she even sleep?

“Well no, I do not need...” Isaber began to answer Riley’s question, then halted, looking slightly odd. “...why yes, thank you.”

Riley was too tired to contemplate on the odd answer, and instead pulled the table to the side so that she could make the bed. “I just have the one set of bedding though... I’d offer you the blanket for yourself, but it will get too cold in here tonight so I’m afraid we’ll have to share.”

Isaber just nodded and, to Riley’s embarrassment, followed her like a puppy as Riley cleaned up and took the last of her evening medication before going to bed. Riley even felt compelled to flee into her tiny bathroom to change into a long T-shirt she could sleep in, not wanting to bare her pale, scarred and emaciated body in front of someone so lovely. She was mortified to find that Isaber stood and watched her get into bed before doing the same, and ready to virtually jump right out of her skin as this mysterious person snuggled up close to share her pillow and her blanket.

If she didn’t ache and tremble so much already, Riley would have taken her chances and let Isaber have the blanket and pillow to herself anyway. As it was, Riley curled her arms tight around herself, biting back against the pain, nausea and dizziness that rolled over her in waves. Normally she’d sleep propped up, or flat on her belly, either being easier for her to handle in terms of nausea and dizziness, and also making it easier to breathe, but there was the person lying next to her to consider... whose warmth was seeping into Riley’s cold and aching limbs from behind like a promise of absolution. Sparing a tiny but fervent thought to whoever or whatever was out there to let her fall asleep quickly for once, and let her stay on her side of the tiny bedding, Riley closed her eyes and tried to empty her mind for sleep.

When Riley woke up very early next morning, she was warm and cuddled snugly into soft arms. She didn’t notice.

She did however notice that she was bleeding profusely from both her nose and her mouth, in fact bleeding all over her unsuspecting body pillow. Scrambling to her feet while fighting with the urge to vomit, head pounding and dizziness making it hard to stand, much less walk, Riley couldn’t take the time to apologize to Isaber. She needed to get to the bathroom, and she needed to do it fast.

She made it... barely.

As Riley divested herself from last nights meal with Isaber’s horrified arms around her as she clutched the porcelain feebly, the little white-hot knives of pain did their worst in her abdomen. Riley tried to cry out with one of the bigger spasms of pain, but all that came out was a wet gurgle as the pain caused her body to try and empty what was already an empty stomach all over again. Then the next wave of pain hit, bigger, sharper, and Riley knew no more.

Isaber yelped as Riley Thomas spasmed once more in her arms, then fell face first towards the bathroom floor. Isaber caught her just in time to save the still profusely bleeding nose from being broken, and carefully laid the woman down on the floor on her side, as far away from the mess as she could manage in the small space. With just the barest hint of hesitation, Isaber tore the ruined T-shirt from Riley’s frail form and bunched it up under her head, then splashed some water into the pasty face.

Once some groaning proved that Riley was once again awake, if not yet quite coherent, Isaber set about cleaning the woman up as best she could. Muttering something under her breath about cheating, she moved her hand slightly over the bridge of Riley’s nose, causing the blood to ease to a small trickle, then a few drops, until it finally stopped. Another movement with her hand, and the bathroom as well as the nearly naked woman on the floor, were both clean.

Hesitating briefly in the doorway after pulling the blanket from the bed to cover Riley’s pale, shivering form, Isaber set about going through the multicoloured drawers that held Riley’s clothing.

Four T-shirts of the same worn uniform grey. Five bras of the same brand, in faded blue or darkened white, next to small piles of neatly folded though mismatched cotton panties. Nine pairs of mended socks in colours that looked like they once had been hideously bright but now had turned muddled. One pair of patched jeans and one pair of threadbare drawstring pants. One denim shirt turned nearly white by use and one baggy sweater that didn’t look much better.

A sad expression crossed Isaber’s soft features as she stood for a moment watching the extent of Riley’s wardrobe, and realizing the implications.

“Pretty pathetic, ain’t it?” A gravelly voice broke into her thoughts. “But when you live on the bottom of the barrel, you take what you can get.”

Isaber turned around quickly, looking somewhat like she was caught doing something she shouldn’t, facing Riley who had managed to get to her feet leaning in the doorway to the bathroom. She was still deathly pale and sweating, but even though she looked so ill it was quite apparent that she was embarrassed.

Then Isaber had to hurry across the floor to keep Riley from falling.

Isaber led the panting Riley to the still unmade couch, and helped her sit down. Riley clutched her head in an instinctive response to the spinning and pounding, while fighting a loosing battle with her breathing. Her medicines would not be enough now, Riley knew, feeling the cramps setting into her chest, squeezing the air out of her lungs and tears to her eyes.

Isaber knelt in front of Riley, gently urging Riley to look at her. Even with the tears that poured out of her own eyes with the breathing cramps, Riley saw the tears that glittered in the silver eyes in front of her before sliding down smooth cheeks, and she was amazed.

“Please... make the wish.” Isaber asked in a tremulous voice. “I cannot do it for you, you must make the wish.”

Blinking slowly as realization dawned, Riley reached out to take Isaber’s hand in her own weak and trembling one. Struggling to press the words out while she could not seem to get enough air and the cramps pulled the steel bands around her chest tighter and tighter, it took Riley a moment to say what she needed.

“Please... make me well again.” Riley wheezed. “I wish to be... healthy.”

Isaber did not answer, but nodded through her tears, then impulsively pulled Riley in for a hug. Riley who had long since grown accustomed to have no human touch in her life outside the sterile environment of hospital visits, gratefully closed her eyes and leaned into the small shoulder, struggling with her pain.

With her eyes closed Riley never saw the light that signified the use of Isaber’s power and Riley’s first wish.




---to be continued?---


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

T_T It was so sad... In the point that living for a day without pain was a luxury. I seen no comment thus far, but it was a very very nice story. (I am saving the word "Beautiful" for the last chapter of this story XD Due to limited vocab.) Hope ya continue anyway ^^

Panda

Ryûchan said...

Panda,
thank you for reading Frailty even though it is far from finished. I come back to this story every once in a while with a few ideas, so I hope to be able to continue writing it at some point (though I can't really promise anything).

Anonymous said...

my goodness...i cant even begin to imagine leaving like that...i think i would have long kill myself by then...

oh..another to add to anticipated continuing of the fic, yeah!

Ryûchan said...

Spikesagitta,
*smiles* I hope to finish it eventually as well. So it seems bad, huh? Well things should look up for Riley now, once Isaber fulfils her wishes. ;)